Someone wounds you, so you want to wound them back. With a harsh remark. By cutting them out of your inner circle. By putting the word out about them. Maybe they hold an awful political view or have done something selfish or mean. So you want to punish them. You want to shame them, draw attention to their awfulness to send a message.
But every time we do this we sense something changing in us, something becoming ugly in us. We don’t feel great afterwards. We may even feel awful.
The Stoics believed that we were part of an inner-connected organism. That you couldn’t help another person without helping yourself.
“We are all bees of the same hive. If I have done something for the common good, then I share in the benefits.”
-Marcus Aurelius
This is why a good life hinges on justice, on helping others, on being a good steward of the hive, of the common good. If you want to help yourself, you have to help others. This is true in almost every circumstance.
It’s also why we struggle so much when we are wronged . I only have 2 cheeks, when i have been forced to turn them both, i make my stand. When i feel used, lied to, taken advantage of, or played for stupid by someone I’ve trusted or loved or held in high esteem, i seek that justice, and it invariably ends in some sort of confrontation.
Which leads me to my question… “Do I walk away in silence, believing I’ve been wronged, or do I stand ( and fight) for the person and the relationship I once proudly believed in, and thought the world of”?
I’ve never properly reconciled this dilemma, and the common thread in this shortcoming is obviously me. Passion, emotion, intellect, common sense, intuition, that gut feeling.. they all meet on my minds battlefield to settle the score and try to end a conflict and seek that inner peace.
I have the double blessing/curse of an incredible memory and an emotional passionate soul. And they feed the rumination.
When does spring training begin? I’d like to evict some people from my brain once and for all and relive and recall that which brings me joy
( As always these words and thoughts are inspired by, expounded and built upon the shoulders of those much wiser than me. While i may never find the answers, the search will forever continue. )
Originally written 1-27-2022
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